After taking a required Intro to Psychology course as an undergrad, I have never looked back. Since my doctoral program, I have specialized in adult relationship therapy. Through my studies and clinicals, I wrote several articles for professional journals and currently in the midst of writing a book.
A Guide on How to Be a Better Boyfriend
How would you know you are a good boyfriend and whether you’re treating your girlfriend right? How can you be a better boyfriend to your loved one?
It’s normal for human beings to worry about such questions when they are in love and when they are in a relationship. It is understandable that you want to make your girlfriend happy by learning how to be a better boyfriend. We’ll show you how.
It Starts With You
If you want to be the best boyfriend she’s ever had, you should be willing to commit to the process. Being a good boyfriend is a continuous journey of being a better person and companion to your girlfriend. You must be willing to learn and unlearn throughout the process and be consistent in your effort to be a better boyfriend.
If you’re trying to be a better partner, you must have your own perspective of what makes a good boyfriend and his duties towards his girlfriend. With these qualities in mind, molding your personality and character towards being a great boyfriend and building a stable and healthy relationship becomes easier.
Below, we have listed some of the qualities that make good boyfriends and some of the duties and obligations they must carry out. Follow these tips and tricks and apply them in your everyday life, and watch your relationship blossom into a magical fairytale.
When I Was Your Man http://t.co/gmhheUY4
— Bruno Mars (@BrunoMars) February 5, 2013
Which Qualities You Need to Be a Better Boyfriend
1. Respect and Admiration
Respect is the foundation of any relationship; without it, you can never love your partner as much as they deserve. Not only do you have to respect your partner, but you have to respect her choices and personal space as well.
When you respect and love someone, you should trust them to reciprocate your love and trust. As such, it is disrespectful to snoop on her devices, track her all the time, or question her whereabouts at each time of the day.
In addition, you must learn to support and respect the choices they make outside the relationship, such as career, family, and friendships. This is the type of respect that every girlfriend deserves from their partner.
2. Be Spontaneous
It is natural and predictable for couples to get comfortable with their relationship. While this might not be the worst thing, it means that you let your companionship get boring, and you no longer care to surprise your partner.
As a good boyfriend, you should know that boredom will eat away at your relationship, and things might start going downhill.
If you’re trying to be a better boyfriend, you should add spontaneity to your personality. According to teen vogue, regularly surprise your girlfriend with flowers, trinkets, and her favorite snacks every once in a while. While they might seem like little things, such random acts assure your lover that you’re constantly thinking about them and you care about their well-being.
If you are in a live-in relationship, spread your spontaneity to your living space as well. Doing the chores and tidying up the house will go a long way in improving your relationship and making your partner feel loved and happy.
3. Be a Good Listener
If you’re dating but don’t know how to be a good partner, then you should learn to listen. This is a strong love language that helps to strengthen your intimacy.
“The foundation of successful communication is being able to truly listen to each other, without constructing a counter argument in your head.”
Michael Batshaw, psychotherapist in Westchester
Give your girl all the attention she requires while she’s talking, and avoid butting in simply because you have something to say. If you’re learning how to be a better boyfriend, then you must be a good listener.
Avoid offering solutions and plans every time she’s venting about an issue. While your actions are in good faith and well intended, not everyone wants a solution to their problems. Sometimes, your partner wants a listening ear while she is talking about her problems and frustrations.
In addition, learning how to listen shows that you trust their decision-making capabilities, and there is no need for you to make any decisions for her.
“There are always two parts of conversation.”
Terri Orbuch, PhD psychologist who specialises in couples
Sometimes, the things that make her upset might be trivial to you, such as being left out of a wedding invitation or a frustrating work environment. On the other hand, they are a big deal to her, so do not assume them simply because you don’t understand the matter. Instead, hear and acknowledge what she says and offer a shoulder to lean on and a hand to hold through her crisis.
![Paying attention to your girlfriend is critical](https://hily-website-stage.tops1.io/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/29_april_2023-1.jpg)
4. Do Not Neglect Her
Learning how to be a better boyfriend means acknowledging that your girlfriend has emotions and needs that you can’t ignore. As such, don’t neglect your partner’s needs and feelings, and always dedicate time to them. It is important to be attentive to your girl if you want to retain your chemistry and bond.
Although no one is perfect, your girlfriend will be happy and content knowing she can always rely on you. Not all her needs are material or financial. So, a woman will expect you to spend time with her, shower her with affection and attention, and fulfill her physical needs.
5. Be Accountable
Being a better bf will, in turn, make you a better man, which is good for your mental and emotional growth.
Women are always attracted to guys who are accountable for their actions. As a boyfriend, it is important to understand when you’re in the wrong.
Suppose you want to build a great relationship. In that case, you must learn to acknowledge your mistakes and actively work towards correcting them. Taking responsibility means accepting the consequences of your actions, so avoid lying just to get out of trouble. Owning up and apologizing will make a big difference in how you resolve conflicts, and she’s going to respect you more.
6. Get Crafty
Sometimes, not all gifts should come from a store. In addition, you can run out of gift ideas fast trying to find the perfect gift. It might also hurt you financially if you have to get all your gifts and trinkets from high-end stores. Sadly, the woman might not be impressed with your presents.
On the other hand, it can be very hard to ignore a handmade gift or token, especially one that makes your day-to-day life easier. Learning arts and crafts allows you to create something sentimental, thoughtful, and useful for your girlfriend.
For instance, you can install that kitchen shelf she’s always wanted or a mini bookshelf for her favorite books and portraits. In related reading, this comes among the top skills every man should master.
Not only are you actively trying to make her happy, but the effort you put into these little things will make her feel appreciated and loved.
7. Don’t Ignore Her Hobbies
There is more to companionship than just love, and you’ve probably learned that from your past relationships.
One of the best qualities of a good boyfriend includes taking an interest and getting invested in your partner’s hobbies. This is a great way to make your girl feel special and valued.
When you’re interested in her hobbies, you can make plans that she could enjoy and have fun with. In addition, you should allow them to talk about their hobbies without you seeming bored or disinterested. If you want to attain the perfect boyfriend status, then you better add this important tip to your notebook.
![Great boyfriend is dedicated to her happiness](https://hily-website-stage.tops1.io/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/14_april_2023-1.jpg)
8. Go on Plenty Dates
One of the most exciting things about a relationship is doing something exciting with your partner. You get to have fun and bond over activities you both love, thus increasing your intimacy.
A good boyfriend is someone who would plan a date night or day that solely focuses on making his girlfriend happy. You don’t have to take much interest in the activity as long as your partner is going to have a blast.
9. Do Not Be Controlling
The best boyfriends support their partners and encourage them to be independent and follow their dreams. On the other hand, a bad boyfriend is jealous and controlling, and they will always impose on their partners.
As a good partner, don’t try to make decisions for her. This includes her social circles, how she interacts with her relatives or her career choices.
Most people will always refer to their boyfriends when they have to make a big decision. While you can make your suggestions and give your input, always keep in mind that it is her decision to make, not yours.
i have never met one of my friends boyfriends and been like wow that guy is awesome i definitely hope he hangs out with us constantly and all the time
— trish (@ULTRAGLOSS) February 24, 2023
10. Be Close to Her Friends and Family
Regardless of how great your relationship is, making a good impression on her family and friends will make life simpler for everyone.
As a good boyfriend, it is your job to get along with her friends and family, so she will never have to choose. While you might not care what they think about you, it will mean a lot for your partner when you can all get along. Although you are her best friend, you should know that other friends are equally important.
How to Be a Better Live-In Boyfriend
When a couple is in a long-term relationship, it is only natural for them to move in together. Should this happen, you should understand that you’re going to be spending more time together. This means that you will have to put in more effort towards being a better boyfriend.
In such a scenario, it is important to understand that live-in relations are not as easy as they seem. It will take effort from both partners to grow into a good relationship.
With the increased level of interdependence on each other, you should know that your words and actions will directly influence your partner and her day. They say actions speak louder than words, so if you want to be a great boyfriend, you must be willing to put in the effort.
11. Be Emotionally Mature
Most relationships tend to crumble because partners are always trying to be right. While arguments and conflicts are unavoidable, how you deal with them will determine the integrity of your relationship.
It is during these moments that you should choose kindness instead of being right. Women respect men who are emotionally mature and who can handle conflict amicably. In addition, avoid dwelling on the same things always. You don’t always have to prove a point.
12. Learn to Compromise
A relationship’s survival largely depends on the partners’ willingness to compromise. A great boyfriend understands that he doesn’t always have to get his way. Sometimes, it’s about agreeing to what the other person wants so they can agree to what you want. Learn to compromise effectively, and your current girlfriend will never leave your side.
Other than compromise, you must be willing to sacrifice in a relationship. You would be surprised at how much these go towards saving your relationship.
13. Work Hard
As a boyfriend, your role is to love your girlfriend, make her feel special, and give her undivided attention. While this takes a lot of effort, it’s not your only job as a boyfriend.
As a live-in boyfriend, you cannot afford the luxury of doing nothing around the house. While watching a football game or playing on your console might be the easier thing to do, put in some effort around the house too. While you don’t have to turn the whole house upside down, you can always do simple chores such as preparing a meal, running the dishwasher, or getting groceries.
Don't expect me to hold doors open for you, make sure you're holding them open for me.
— The Controlling BF (@YourDreamBF) July 1, 2012
14. Give Her Space
Part of learning how to be a better boyfriend includes learning to respect your girlfriend’s personal space and boundaries. This is especially important for live-in relationships.
Although you love each other, you both need some alone time to unplug. This is very beneficial to relationships, and it will work towards maintaining a healthy interdependence.
While you encourage her to do activities alone or with her friends, it is important that you also have a way to unplug and unwind as a form of self care.
15. Avoid Trigger Topics
If you want to be the best boyfriend, you must learn how to hold a conversation with your partner without always bringing up trigger topics. Learn how to talk about sensitive issues so they won’t escalate into unpleasant arguments.
Topics such as relatives, religion, or career choices are mostly unavoidable. Paying attention to your partner allows you to know their triggers, so you’ll know how to maneuver around them.
This way, spending time with your partner won’t always have to end in arguments and nasty fights.
If it’s something you must talk about, be calm and collected, and assure your girlfriend that it won’t end in a fight. Listen to her side, and be honest with your opinion.
16. Allow Yourself to Grow
Some of the best relationship advice on how to be a better boyfriend includes giving your mate time and space to grow as a person.
Suppose you want your relationship to continue growing. In that case, you should be willing to let go of certain practices and behaviors that your partner frowns upon. Self reflection allows you to notice what you could do better to improve yourself and your relationship.
![How to make your girlfriend happy on a long distance](https://hily-website-stage.tops1.io/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/30_april_2023-1.jpg)
Dating Over Long Distance
There is nothing that stops you from being the best boyfriend, even when you’re far from your partner. Women will always appreciate the effort they put into a relationship, especially when they are doing it from a distance.
Here are a few things you’d expect from a good boyfriend who is in a long-distance relationship;
17. Virtual Dates
Virtual dating is a great way to maintain intimacy in your relationship. Thanks to the internet, you can have a face-to-face conversation, watch your favorite movie, or play a game.
In addition, virtual dates allow you to be present for special occasions, such as birthdays or anniversaries.
18. Make Her Your Top Priority
Your girlfriend should always be your number one priority, and make sure she knows that. Be honest and consistent every single day, and assure her that there are no other girls.
Accept her as she is, and always take care of her feelings. Even over a long distance, she will always feel warm from your love and consistency.
Dedicate Yourself to Making Her Happy
Love is beautiful when both partners work towards making each other happy. Learning to love your girlfriend in her preferred love language will help her to appreciate you more. She will see that her presence and feelings matter to you.
By applying these tips, she’s going to treat you like the king you are, and she’s never going to replace you.